Donald MacLeod: Our puffed-up PM Theresa May has picked a fight to make us all Brexit losers

WHEN the going gets tough, the tough get going!

And when it comes to Brexit, the wannabe seen to be tough leaders on both sides, the EU and the UK, have dropped all pretence of being nice to each other.

Accusations and insults have flown from both sides as they set out their uncompromising stalls.

Forget all the promises that the negotiations would be carried out in a reasonable, amicable and professional manner.

Forget the mealy-mouthed assurances that it is in the future interests of the UK and the 27 members of the EU, that the negotiations be expedient, cordial, considered and respectful of each other’s position.

No chance! Not if this week’s undignified accusations being slung across the Channel are anything to go by.

At this rate there is a better chance of Donald Trump meeting North Korea’s Kim Wrong ’Un for a few beers than there is of Europe and the UK sitting down for a friendly chat.

Puffed-up PM Theresa May, frustrated at details of her disastrous Downing Street dinner with EU Commissioner Jean-Claude Juncker being leaked, said he would find her “a bloody difficult woman” to deal with if provoked.

In other words: “Come and have a go if you think you’re hard enough.”

Which is all well and good if you pick a fight with someone smaller than you.

Well that’s definitely not the case with the EU. This is a grudge match and they are now angry heavyweights.

Enraged at the UK’s decision to leave their self-serving little club, EU member states have found a common enemy in Brexit and have unified against it.

They have one purpose – to save and protect what they have.

Ditching their commitment to be friends and play nicely, now they will fight dirty, all the way.

EU negotiator Michael Barnier, says that he doesn’t want to punish the UK then slaps us with a humongous divorce settlement fee of £84 billion.

The UK’s opposite number, the half-asleep David Davis, rightly said: “No way, Barnier!”

PM May, never one to miss an opportunity to look tough with an election around the corner, then waded in, acting like a big mouth at a pre-fight weigh-in to accuse European politicians off interfering in the UK’s General Election and misrepresenting the UKs negotiating positions.

Sorry what position is that, Theresa? We don’t have one because they aren’t talking or listening to you!

They don’t want you at the negotiating table because of your belligerent and uncompromising attitude to the talks.

At least in boxing when two fighters are ripping into each other at the pre-match there is a ring prepared for them to slug it out in and the rules of engagement decided.

But where and when are talks going to take place? What are the rules of engagement? How long will the fight last? What is the prize for the winner? Seems to me a draw is on the cards – both sides lose.

But there can be no fight, no talks, unless they stop the name-calling and start the peace.

Given the time it has taken to get as far as the insults, let alone agreeing the terms of negotiation, it will be another 10 years, maybe 20, before a deal is done.

And by then most of the electorate will be scratching their heads wondering what Brexit even is. Maybe that’s been the cunning plan all along?

Tough going, indeed.