WHEN Donald Trump said he was going to build a wall, I didn’t think he was going to do it live on TV – and put me in it!
Wish me luck, folks, for tonight I’m going to be live in front of an audience of 50 million people.
After the Superbowl, one of the biggest TV audiences of the year, there’s a new talent show premiering on CBS hosted by my pal, James Corden, and I’ve been invited to take part.
It’s called The World’s Best, featuring the cream of talent from all four corners of the world.
There’s going to be a wall with 50 judges from different countries from around the world – and your old pal is going to be representing Scotland!
I’m nervous about being on the telly in front of 50 million folks – the first and last time it’ll happen, no doubt!
But at the same time, I’m made up for James Corden.
He’s been hosting The Late Late Show since 2015, and his Carpool Karaoke idea has turned into something of a global viral phenomenon.
The US judges on The World’s Best are Ru Paul, Faith Hill and Drew Barrymore.
I’ve not been this nervous about facing a group of judges since the time I hosted the British Legal Association’s Christmas Ball.
Who would have thought they’d let me on a talent show? The clue is in the description, surely.
The thought of me telling other people they’re rubbish on the telly didn’t appeal to me at first – it sounded like what I experience when I look at Twitter every morning!
But I’m looking forward to joining my fellow judges.
The Wall Of The World, as it’s called, will have 49 other countries on it.
I just hope my wee pod isn’t too high up in case I get excited, accidentally do a flying header off the side and land on South Korea.
On the other hand, a part of me hopes I’m near the top of the wall – that way I’ll finally be at eye-level with Ru Paul.
I’m aware I will be representing Scotland for the first time – sadly I’m still waiting on the call-up for the men’s national football team – but I’m not sure how hard to go in on the national stereotypes.
Don’t be surprised if you see me brandishing a claymore while drinking whisky and shouting incomprehensibly.
It’s what I usually get up to on a Sunday night anyway!