Monaco isn’t a football town.
Forget about their team: the one that has been bankrolled to the edge of glory and the heights of cynicism by the Principality’s royals over the decades.
Despite the world class players who have plied their trade on their doorstep, the beautiful people of Monte Carlo don’t give a monkeys about the beautiful game.
Their game is money.
Walking – or should I say hiking – around this mega-rich, cliffside enclave for the day is like going to the zoo in reverse.
The visitors are the ones really in cages, while the locals careen around the glittering plains of rampant consumerism, Louboutins pressed to the pedals of their Porsches with the kind of abandon only supercharged financial muscle can muster.
The truth is, for the average punter, Monaco is only a place worth visiting if you enjoy climbing hundreds of stairs to places you can’t afford to go into.
Head 20-odd miles west along the Cote d’Azur and it’s a different story.
Nice is home to one of France’s most formidable, albeit not its most storied, teams.
Their stadium, the impressive Allianz Riviera, is where Scotland will kick off their Women’s World Cup campaign.
It’s a relatively new ground, but it already has something Monaco’s Stade Louis II will never possess – soul.
The Scottish players will feel it when they take the field on Sunday.
So will the English.
Their coach, former Manchester United and Everton man, Phil Neville, tried to forge a unique spirit in his own camp by taking his players off to a pre-World Cup, Royal Marines boot camp.
And if the vibe in the Scotland camp today is anything to go by, Neville’s Lionesses will need to use everything they learned with the Commandos this weekend.
Don’t get the wrong idea – the Scots aren’t charging around the training ground with teeth bared before retiring to their hotel to waterboard each other into psychosis.
Nope. The mood at their beachfront, Nice hotel today was relaxed.
But that’s what confidence gives you – and its value shouldn’t be underestimated.
Come Sunday, Shelley Kerr will make sure her players have their war paint on.
For the time being, however, there’s no need.
Up the road in the city’s main square, Place Massena, families, tourists and shoppers tend to mingle long into the evening.
Come midnight, happy kids and their merry parents still occupy the tables of the countless outdoor bars and restaurants in the Old Town.
It’s as if nobody wants to go home.
Put Scotland firmly into that camp with them.
And while you’re at it, stick me there too.